LIGHTBULB CONTEST

Poor Fang. Never even got to say the punchline...

Here's the set-up:

"Hey, Goliath, how many gargoyles does it take to screw in a lightbulb..."

Time for our next ASK GREG contest. It's simple and subjective. Finish the joke. The punchline that gives me the biggest laugh wins a prize of no real value, but hopefully of some mild interest.

A few rules:

1. Since we're giving out a prize, no anonymous entries will be accepted. I'll ask Todd to delete them before I even see them.

2. All posts must be clearly marked with "LIGHTBULB CONTEST" in capital letters at the head of the post.

3. Don't ask additional questions with your entry. In fact I'd recommend that you don't include anything that might distract me from laughing at your joke.

4. Spelling COUNTS!!!

5. You may enter as many times as you wish. But each entry MUST be posted seperately. Try to be selective and funny. BEWARE!!! If I sense that you're just taking multiple random stabs at it in order to try and win by the shotgun method, it may prejudice me against you.

6. I'm acknowledging up front that this is a completely subjective contest. You (many or even all of you) may not agree with my final choice. But the decisions of the judges (i.e. yours truly) are final.

7. We will accept entries posted before the end of September, 2001. I'll decide on the winner AFTER I've read all the September posts. (So figure on November, HOPEFULLY.)

One last bit of random incentive, if we ever do make BAD GUYS, I will give Fang the opportunity to complete his joke, using (with permission) the winning entry.

GLITCH

okay something very weird just happened. I was answering a question that Matt posted about the 'chameleon gene'. Then suddenly, the question just changed. My answer (which I was in the process of writing) remained , but there was now a new question listed above it.....

Hmmmm.... Okay, I think Gore just re-activated the question answering function while I was typing and we had a little glitch here. Matt's question was lost. I'll try to recreate it a bit...

1. Matt wrote something like, "I know you're not a biologist, but how does this chameleon gene' work."
2. Matt thought gargoyles were the sources of various legends, but does the chameleon gene cause gargoyles to look like legendary characters.
3. He asked whether the gene would start changing the looks of familiar clans over time. Or something like that.
4. He stated that he had his own theories as to heredity, etc. And he challenged me to 'sell' him on my chameleon gene theory.
5. He had at least a fifth part to the question (maybe more) but I didn't even get the chance to read it.

My answers to his original question; not to the paraphrased versions above. (Man, this is a mess.)

1. I have no idea. It was just a random thought.

2. No. Definitely not. You're first thought was correct.

3. Natural Mutations (not the Sevarius kind) are likely to occur. They occur to some degree in all species. I was simply positing (and only positing) that Gargoyles might have a gene that causes mutations to occur more frequently. But mostly, garg appearance is defined by heredity.

4. I don't have to sell you on anything. For starters, I'm not sure I've sold myself on it. Second, I'm under no obligation to compete with your personal beliefs. Third, if it isn't in the 66 -- I'm not guaranteeing it. Even some of that is suspect. Sevarius theorized that gargs absorb solar energy while stone. But that was just a theory. He may have been right. He may have been wrong. He may have been partially right. Or he may have been lying intentionally. See?